Entry # 5 : Lessons from my haircut: What I learned about vanity, and true love.

"Love is a commitment towards imperfect people, seeking their highest good." -Pastor Peter Tanchi

The Friday before thanksgiving, I was not preparing for thanksgiving week by having a thankful heart and counting my blessings. Instead, I allowed the bitterness and anger of that day to not only linger, but I nourished it with negative thoughts. Let me explain.

I have been trying to grow my hair out for the past six months. After a long period of having short hair, I decided to try long hair. Haha. I'm realizing as I write this just how petty this was, but bear with me. I have had many bad haircuts. For example, the person who cut my hair before this haircut cut the hair long in the back and short in the front. It looked a little off. After six months of growing it out, I decided to even it out again, and my mom recommended her hairstylist, "Kathy." I was hesitant, because Kathy is Vietnamese, and doesn't speak English fluently, and I wasn't sure how easy communicating the kind of haircut I wanted would be. My mom assured me she could speak English, so we went. Long story short, Kathy cut it, but instead of following my request to make my hair one length all the way around, she gave me the same haircut that was short in the front, and long in the back, only shorter. Not only did I receive the same haircut that looked semi-awkward, but I felt as if I had been forced to backtrack in my efforts to grow my hair out. I was annoyed. Actually, I wasn't just annoyed. I. was. ANGRY! RARRRR! I spent the next few days wallowing in self-pity, giving my mom a bratty attitude, and even building up hatred towards Kathy. I mean, at one point, I even purposely pulled two sweaters off of their hangers at Target. Pretty ridiculous. I mean, really? Who does that?

That Sunday, Pastor Peter Tanchi spoke on the topic of love and how it is a commitment towards imperfect people, seeking their highest good. I was so convicted. My love for everyone I come into contact with (and that group definitely includes Kathy) should reflect the love that God has shown me. Because He loves me, I am able to reflect His love to others. God displayed His love to me that day by speaking to me in a very personal way through His Word, despite the fact that I had had the most rotten attitude the past few days. That day, God revealed that I really needed to do four things: repent from the sins that I had committed the past few days: my bad attitude towards my mom, my vanity, hypocrisy and my anger, forgive Kathy for not cutting my hair correctly, and be thankful for His unfailing, perfect love for me and share that love with others.

Praise God for the fact that He never gives up on us.